I'm in a season of saying out loud exactly what my heart/mind is really asking. I have been able to do that on occasion in my history (some evidenced in this blog of course...which has saved my life), but I feel I've largely withheld my questions or aches in the face-to-face interactions of my life.
* In some of my realms of involvement, I've felt like I have to "play the game"...calculated moves and political strategy. (Working with invested people in boards and committees, dealing with donors and their children, etc. will quickly teach someone how to do that.)
* In other areas, I feel like my "pleaser" personality has placed me second to the opinions and convictions of others.
* Still others, though, have been driven by my own fear. Yep...I've been concerned too much with being judged for my perspectives, so I've chosen cowardice.
Recent events have brought me to a place of...to be honest...who the hell cares? I'm so sick of being penned in anymore. The consequences are beyond what I'm willing to carry anymore. So...I'm going to hold myself accountable now to be more candid...with myself, with others. And honestly, I think I'm going to feel far more free from some of the oppression I've had to deal with from elitists because I'm honoring my heart and what I think is true for the situations, but even more...I'm going to learn some amazing things from people who have the courage to be more real (in my observations of how they do things but also in their responses to my new craze).