Come Away With Me

now, i'm at the point of talking about what happened at the 'captivating' retreat that i went to last weekend. this would be 'part 1'. :)

i don't have a 'book smart' relationship with god....i'm pretty sure everyone knows that. ;) it's a romance for me...and i love it (even the fighting...hehe). but, if you've read any of my blogs below, you know that i've been majorly fighting with god...so going to the retreat had it's own challenges. haha! myself being the biggest one! :) well, they gave us a TON of 'quiet time' at this retreat...which actually really bugged me at first because i didn't have anything nice to say god.

he apparently had nice things to say to me...he's so unpredictable! keeps me hopping...

well, the first night i went back to my bunk to be all 'quiet'. i flipped through my bible, found some nice verses, thought about them for a while. you know...good 'christianese' behavior. well, then these few words of a song started rolling through my brain. "come away with me in the night". my brain let out a huge "oh crap!"...god was actually showing up to meet with this obstinate gal. ;) i tried as hard as i could to ignore it...i'll talk more about why another time...and finally gave up. a resounding "fine!" shot through my head, and i bolted out the door. i decided to meet him literally...i went ouside into the night. "here i am...in the night!" (ya, i'm thinking god either loves my honesty with him...or he wants to pop me like a zit.) the words came again..."come away with me"...over and over and over again.

so, there i stood in the middle of the woods, listening to the wind flow through the leaves, and i just started to sway. swaying back and forth. haha...reminds me of the 'pocahontas' scene with her hair all "blowy" in the wind.

and that was it. we just swayed.

so i spent my first 'quiet time' slow dancing with god to the rhythm in the wind.

i never could remember who actually sang that song...or what the rest of the words were. that is until today. here it is...the lyrics are wonderful. the video is odd...but oh well...just close your eyes.

Come Away With Me

Yearn

i'm going to use this in my sermon tomorrow, i think. man, it just makes me want to relax back into the heart of god.

Love and the Klan

interesting. the guy makes a comment at the end about how the klan was brought down by a man who used his "mind". he then corrects it by saying "his heart". i couldn't agree more!!! all the smarts in the world only get us so far...but a heart of compassion fueling the mind...watch out.

Texting while Driving...

jody showed me this today. it was an infomercial in england...graphic for sure. i wonder if it had any impact. sure does for me.

Healer

i've been loving this song lately...

Dreams...

one of my friends told me something interesting this weekend. she said that she was thinking about how dreams aren't just meant to be dreamed. they are meant to be lived. maybe that's not rocket science to you, but it got me thinking. when i think of my dreams, they are usually desired ends...results. in reality though, dreams are so much more. in dreaming...the end can't be seperated from the journey.

so, i've made an interesting realization about myself.

i've lately stopped dead in my tracks from the journey of my dreams (desires) because i'm not sure that god will give me the end of my dreams. i've made my "living" contingent on the definite end.

the bummer???...you can't truly celebrate the last chapter without having experienced every preceeding page. and...it's each page that shapes how you want the story to end...and that can change with each turn.

it has me thinking...

The "Captivating" Retreat...

oh man....i wish i could explain everything that i/we were up to...but...ummm...some things are better left un-typed. ;)

as many people know, i've had my socks blessed off by many of the books by john eldredge. i still find the reaction of some to his material to be a bit comical, but everyone is truly allowed their own opinion. it's not that he's an uber-idol or even has the amazing program for a perfect life...he's just a guy that wrote some books about his relationship with god. turns out...his thoughts actually helped me meet god in a more personal and profoundly real way. i'm a jesus-lover...not an eldredge-disciple. (but i thank eldredge for pointing a finger...) ;)

so...one of the books that i loved....needed...was 'captivating'. it's a celebration of the feminine heart...and our hottie god that made us to dance with him. well, i had the opportunity to go to a retreat that was based on the material. it was very good...and they accentuated the material with wonderful stories and movie clips. excellent!

of course, not everything was totally perfect. there were some downers, some shockers...but honestly...the deficits only invited us to come up with our own "enhancements". that was great for drawing us together...for supporting each other...we even had a lady decide that she wanted to know jesus!!! so...it was great!

you know what i've decided....well, maybe i should say "what fire has been lit again"...i think i want to do these kinds of retreats or seminars or meetings. i have to start marchin' in that direction again soon. hmm...i wonder how that could work out...

The Parting...

i read this article the other day about how it seems that american christianity is taking two different roads now. 1. those that believe faith is about being a "sinner saved by grace" with the cross as the ticket out of hell. 2. those that believe faith is about becoming who god intended us to be with the cross addressing sin as the obstacle to true intimacy with god.

i think i have to agree with the article. i've noticed this play out in churches...people who unfortunately need the "side" mentality. however, i've noticed that there are some who get misassigned to a "side" too. in those cases, it seems like wording needs to be hammered out better. ("what do you mean when you say..." etc.)

i have to say...if we must have "camps" on the subject, i think i'm more and more in the 2nd.

uh-oh...does that mean that i have to hand in my badge?? ;) naaa...

Enter the Defender

oh my gosh!...i got "defended" today. man, did that feel good. you know how there are just some circumstances where you feel a bit alone...a little vulnerable. it's a miracle when i can actually get myself to ask for help, but this time i did...and god really helped out using some skillful people. :)

A Little Professionalism Goes a LONG Way...

oh man...here comes a pet peeve.

there are some things that the "fly by the seat of your pants" philosophy works for, but i'm not a huge fan of that being an all-encompassing notion. in some situations it actually looks like there's a lack of investment or a laziness involved...and that's an impression that sticks.

hence, why i like a dose of professionalism. plan things out. embrace a little order where appropriate. toss out the "last minute" scramble as the norm. doing so really communicates an enthusiasm and makes people want to join the "team"...to even sacrifice for it.

ok, i got that off my chest. thanks! :)

Interesting Question

one of my pastors sent this to me. an interesting question really. the more i think about it i have to agree with huxley. our culture is "amusing itself to death".

interesting cartoon

Bee Sting Kicked My Butt

i was stung by a ground bee on friday night. hurt like a mother!!! mostly, it was super sore in the spot of the sting, but it was "tolerable". well, on sunday morning i woke up to a throbbing arm. somehow the sting made my arm and hand swollen! i looked like i had a club for a left appendage. hehe. so i got nixed from doing my sermon. :( but, it worked out ok. ben was able to take my spot, and it sounds like god really spoke through him. yay! now, i'm just waiting for my swelling/itching to subside...(because it's driving me mad).

Surprise!

well, i'm trying to pull a sermon up outta heya! ;)

my cousin can't do his sermon that was regularly scheduled...yay! he gets to earn some cash instead!!! :)

so i'm trying to come up with something.

thankfully it's also a communion sunday. :)

Control Freaks

oh my gosh...there needs to be an "anonymous" group for the control freaks of america.

you've gotta know what i mean...those that HAVE to know everything, have an opinion about everything, can't let people live their own life, etc...and like to throw weird fits when they can't???

ya, there needs to be a support group for the controllers.

INFP

i took a myers-briggs test the other day. the condensed version of a personality test. my score was much like a more comprehensive one that i took years ago. i don't know if i totally agree with all that it says, but some of the descriptions are totally accurate.

INFP

People should see your makeup???

i do not fully ascribe to that philosophy.

i won a makeover in a silent auction last year. i was finally able to meet with the consultant the other day. when i arrived for the appointment, i immediatly noticed that her foundation was a shade or two dark compared to her natural skin tone.

a huge "UH-OH!" went flying through my brain...

aaaaaand...i was right.

she later told me that her "philosophy" on makeup is that she wants everyone to know that she's wearing it...even her foundation!!!

and that's how she made me over.

ummm...ya....NO!

this is why i usually don't take just anyone's word for it on that stuff. i trust people who use their makeup to accentuate their features not blow the bajoozies out of them. :)

Happy for my Ovaries!!!

hahahaha...well, if you are a guy, you may want to stop reading...

so, many people know that my mom had a battle with ovarian cancer, as did one of her aunts years ago. my mom (and god) won that one, and my great-aunt didn't. my sis and i are very aware of the possibility someday of encountering this "c"...and every year at when it's time for the physical, i deal with the notion that it could be time to face that.

not fun at all...but it has a way of re-focusing life a little. and that's good.

well, i'm very happy today because i had my appointment with a new physician. my previous doctor was wonderful, but she moved. i've been nervous to not find a good "next" one. but i did!!!! as soon as she was aware of the history, she was all over taking more of a preventative approach. she even said that when i get to my "menopausal years", she'll order the removal of my little girls. ;)

i'm so happy for me...and them!!!

Being the Spectator...

i'm getting to the age where i'm realizing more and more how much of a challenge it is to witness each other's lives. it's easier when you don't care about anyone...then decisions and their consequences really don't matter. but when you decide to live a little bit bigger than self-only, seeing choices and the possible and actual implications can be...heart-wrenching.

it's been a rough week of that. a sweet little blast from the past emerged...and the consequences of past decisions were...well, quite disheartening. other situations where it's pretty clear that people sometimes need their issues more than getting freedom...man, and seeing the possible pain that those choices could inflict...???...i just feel like being a spectator sucks sometimes.

Road Trip!

sis and i (and my nieces) went on a road trip to visit my cousin in omaha. it was a whirlwind, but it was sooo much fun! we went to the omaha zoo which was just about the most amazing thing i've seen. TOTALLY worth going a visit. i plan to go back because we didn't get to see everything...did i mention "amazing"?? :) i was able to finally see a real-live penguin...of the african penguin sort. very cool! now, i'm just on the hunt for an arctic one. sweet!

one funny thing i discovered...whenever i'm driving long distances, i do funny things to keep my mind busy. namely...i calculate. i find myself figuring out the time it will take me to go certain amounts of miles using my fab algebra skills. ;) i even had joy doing the math to check me. HAHA...umm, quirky.

so...cheers to road trips...and cheers to trips with sis! :)

Waiting Game...

the one tricky part about 'august' for my job is waiting/hoping for courses and schedules to 'click'. it's a major undertaking, and most of the people that are affected by it really have no idea how much of a challenge it is.

right now, my biggest challenges relate to the junior high electives. i really want to try to find some new, broader experiences for them than the choral music and drama that they've had for several years. finding people...especially people who are willing to work for lint...is really hard though.

so, if you think of it...maybe fire up a quick one for me. i know god can and will sort it out...it's just stressful in the meantime...

Balance Beam

a friend posted this on facebook today, and i thought it was really good and true!...challenging!

Worship Teamin'

i like singing with my uncle roger. i got to this past weekend. :) he's very cool for starters. he's a really sweet guy...hilarious too! when it comes to music, he can hear the different harmony possibilities and can alternate between them. that makes it easier to also fiddle with different parts...or give him options when i can only hear one part. ;)

the other person i love singing with is my bro-in-law rommel. he usually leads and plays an accoustic guitar. i love the songs he chooses...variety...but i also love the keys that he sings them in!!! puts things in my range...hehe.

with all the variety of leaders and singers (which is good), i rarely get to sing with both of them together. this week, though,...mucho fun! :)

Soooo Glad Rachel's Back

my housie (roomie) returned today. she went on the retreat that i was also hoping to attend (but i got a flu/cold that i wasn't wanting to "share"). with all of the weirdness with the other situation i've blogged about, though, i haven't been able to sleep well knowing i was the only one home. that certainly wasn't helping me get better either.

but she returned!!!

the moment she pulled in the driveway, i started to get sleepy.

i offered out to god that this would also be another good reason for him to bring mr. right my way. he's still considering it. ;)

Niece Kisses...

i had one of my nieces on my lap today during church, which, of course, i always love. this particular niece has the BEST cheeks in the world, and today, her fancy during the sermon was to have our cheeks "kiss"...yep, cheek to cheek. then she got the idea for her nose to give my cheeks "eskimo kisses".

ya, i love when they are still young enough to be 'snugglers'. :)