Theology Evaluation

How true!!!! I stumbled across this quote on Facebook today. It was posted by Bethel Church in Redding, CA. So many Christians will "agree" with this statement..."of course, love is the point!"...but when it comes to the "action" of their lives..."how about homosexuals? how about muslims?"...well, love goes right out the door.

I heard a sermon recently that challenged us to use the armor of God appropriately. That belt of truth and that breastplate of righteousness, they are defensive in nature. For the wearer!!!...to guard their own heart. They aren't designed to be removed and used offensively. Boy, does that have me thinking lately.

We need to evaluate!!! More love, more wisdom...action from the place of intimacy with the Trinity.

Time to evaluate.

Still Obsessing about God's "Now"

The awesome thing about embracing God's "Now" and waiting until He says it's time...as opposed to being shackled to our need for instant gratification...is that we embrace a blessing of quality and value instead of safety and smallness. Here's to daring to live in and out of His perspective!! Much, much better! 

Time for a Change

It hit me like a ton of bricks this morning...how much my job feels like I'm fighting against more than for. I concede that there is the possibility that frustration is tainting my perspective, and I plan to pray about that. But, the war that seems so unnecessarily waged is one that is forcing the question of my authentic calling. Maybe this isn't my battle to fight...and if not, what is?

What's the battle, you ask? Standing against something I bump into constantly in the evangelical church...the legalistic, appearance-driven, poser mentality. Let me tell you...it is so very strong...and ACCEPTED...because all the right-looking behavior meets the "rules" of their faith. Unfortunately, it takes a ton of pride, shame and people-eating to maintain.

There are people who are called to actively fight that mentality. I'm just not sure I'm one of them anymore.

Why???

I want to fight for something. I want to stand for being a real Abba's child, experiencing intimacy with the Trinity, and bringing real and true kingdom life to this reality. Bringing heaven to earth!!! Relationship and mission...in the context of being able to be REAL, which, while exposing struggle, means we also can experience the unleashing of original glory. No manufacturing, no manipulating...no "club".

I seriously think I need a better outlet. What might that be??...maybe I want to work more actively in the realm of the non-denominational church. Seriously praying about a change.

Live in God's "Now"

I'm so aware of the implications of our choice to live in this "now" or in God's. Accessing God's presence and living in the realities of His kingdom life and purposes frees us from the desperation that comes from a life defined solely by the molecules and moments of which we are aware.

I look at my own history and see how my surrendering of my unmet needs to the lesser reality put me in a position of having to manufacture and manipulate to try to achieve whatever "wholeness" I was looking for. Desperation not peace. Hurry and stress not patience. A life very much ruled by the "poser" self...far too limited by diminished perspective. 

Something beautiful happens when we can release our needs to God's "now". He can finally be the true answer to those unmet places...and He can open the floodgates of blessing in His right timing. The blessings might come in different packages or timings than we thought appropriate, but when they come...oh yes, they'll have been well worth the wait. 

Live in God's "Now"...yep, a good reminder to start each day in His reality. 

Pursuit

Oh my word...I've just been enjoying "getting away" with God lately!! This song rocks my socks off. :)

 

Adoption

Precious story and powerful reminder of our own adoption by God. :)

 

Oceans

Intimacy with God is so possible. The God of "I am yours and you are Mine". I've been loving sitting with Him in this song lately. The deeper deep... :)

 

Frozen No More

 I cannot tell you how much I identified with Princess Elsa in Disney's new movie "Frozen". Oh my wow. The Ice Princess...her gift subdued unsuccessfully by fear, abandonment to a life of isolation to protect herself, invitation to a life of true love. Oh my...I couldn't resemble that more!! So very familiar with fear and self-protection, and thanks to Jesus, I know more and more of true love's freedom!!!!

Gonna be buying this one for sure!!! :)

Healing

“Our wounds are often the openings into the best and most beautiful part of us.” 

I saw this quote online today. Really got me thinking about how God can take anything and make it beautiful again. It's definitely not a fun thing to do...going to the places of wounds...but it's truly the only way we can live a life NOT ruled by them. Being authentically free...that's what is on the other side of the healing journey. Much better than a life of over-reaction and avoidance.

See The Beauty

Closing Those Doors

I'm not one of those people that likes to stay in a constant place of looking into the past. I used to do that a ton, but I've found that God is way better at revealing things from before in just the right time for His perfect healing. Ever the Gentleman. I'm certainly not denying their existence...Lord, I see the damage from that perspective all the time in the lives of great people who live less because of it. Just doesn't work. What I'm saying is...I'm not a wound hunter. Instead I've decided to take the posture of obedience when God reveals those things and spend the rest of my time allowing Him to release me into the beauty He's created me to be.

So...lately...God's been beckoning me into a season of looking back and allowing closure.

The clue God's been giving me that it's time???...in the face of unfathomable honor from someone, I find myself grieving moments from my past where I was not treated honorably. Guy vs. Man. The grief means some doors are still open...and God's getting ready to help me close them.

Terrifying and exciting at the same time.

So...just a reminder that God is both wild and good. He has a ferocious anger for the pain of His children and the gentle goodness to walk us back to painful places to breathe His healing out. He fills in broken places so our forward movement into greater strength is unhindered.

If He gives you the invitation...take it. :)

Powerful Story

Wow. Such a powerful story! The healing and freedom obviously take time...but when we let God have our pain...Wow...Amazing.

 

Those "Crazy" Ladies

My cousin passed this on to me. Interesting to think about!

On Labeling Women "Crazy"

Mom Hears Daughter's Heart

He Is Faithful

This song is rockin' my socks off lately! :)

 

Guess Who's in the Seat of Honor?

I was so struck by something in Growth Group on Sunday. November is our "Spotlight on Service" month...encouraging a life of intentional honor and kindness. The discussion, which highlighted Jesus washing the disciples' feet, began with setting up the scene. The way the story was written indicates where some of the people were sitting.

John on Jesus' right as the protector...it was customary for a close friend to sit nearest the door in case of attack. 

And on Jesus' left, a person deserving of honor...Judas.

I find that SO VERY fascinating!!

Jesus actually placed Judas, the one He knew would betray Him, in the seat of honor. Even in the face of impending injustice, Jesus chose honor. I'm so...awed.

It's a good challenge for me. I don't always react so nobly...humbly...in the face of betrayal. But, Jesus did...and makes it possible for us to do the same. 

AND...when we are the betrayers, the bringers of pain and suffering...Jesus would place each of us in the seat of honor too. That makes me come undone. 

Wow. 

Racism

Sadly, it's alive and well... :(

Can't Get It Out Of My Mind

It's true! I have a mind that grabs ideas and thinks and thinks and thinks...hoping the Holy Spirit will give me a bit more insight. Why?...well, OCD could be a contributor...Haha! But...I just really want to know more about kingdom realities..."know" in an experiential way...because I suspect our understanding is so much less than God's design.

Wouldn't it be so amazing if we as the church could live out more accurately the desires of God's heart?

So, I can't get "Grace" out of my mind. It spins over and over and over... The reason is that the definition that the church tends to live out seems so lacking and actually inappropriate sometimes...limiting our ability to love, forgive and invest well. We live something like this, "God's grace forgave a loser like me and keeps me from a life of eternal fire and damnation. I try to remind myself daily how much His grace puts up with crap like me." That or we do something like this, "God's grace means I can live however I want because He and I are cool. If I want to keep doing things that break my own heart or the hearts of others, no problem! He's just happy I'm saved." It all seems...severely limited. Especially as we get to know God's heart more.

I'm starting to think that it might take all of eternity to grasp the magnificence of Grace. That long because God is so beautifully good and beyond our mind's comprehension. We will experience it but not be able to find the words... I love that.

Here's my thought this week. A snapshot of Grace. The focus of Grace isn't sin. It speaks to it, conquers it...but its focus is more permeating in the spirit. It has its sight set on sources of sin...the roots, the wounds, the brokenness. He knows those things can be healed and restored, and He actually can and does! AND...beyond that...in its cross-hairs is DESIGN. Grace embraces "becoming"...believes that the words of powerful identity divinely written on the heart can truly be illuminated by His presence and unleashed in this lifetime!!!

It ain't just forgiveness and a "get outta hell" ticket for life's losers!!! It ain't just "get outta hell" and live apathetic to growth and freedom!!!

It's this...He takes a girl like me...as I was and as I can be...forgives me, heals my broken heart and the wounds that torment me and fills them with beauty and wholeness, and inspires and launches me into a life where I will express the identity and the gifts of the daughter He's made me to be. I'll know eternity today...and someday even more fully.

I want to see myself like that...and the world. A life of compassion and investment.

Your "Grace" Is Showing

I'm starting to realize how much our true understanding of grace is shown in our response to the sin of others.

Not the "grace" that is relativistic, permissive...

Not the "grace" that utilizes shame as a tactic to maintain behavior...

The "Grace" that values the heart, that invests in people no matter the baggage or stain, that has higher and deeper standards for wholeness than the behavioral regulations of legalism. Truly, so beautiful.

Once in a while I encounter people who use the word "grace" in their every day Christian language like they are pro's at it but who cannot display with their actions the realities of "Grace". Tending towards anger issues and snap reactions. Incapable of the forgiveness they would long for from others. It's so frustrating because they just jump from church to church in constant dismay that "everyone else" can't get it together like they can.  Sigh. (Yep, irony intended.)

But then there's Jesus. Oh, I love Him so much. He sees the heart. He sees the divine story written for that heart...and believes it can happen because of His Grace...no matter the unsightly condition to start with. I'm sure He loves accountability, healthy boundaries and all that...but He always offers His hand to get back up.

I think that's His heart for the church in America. The high hopes of His kingdom.

Now...to pray that into reality more. Sigh. Encounters with Jesus that redefine a poor definition.

Praying that for myself too. Goodness knows Jesus' Grace also has a heart for them too. ;)

Crushing Sticks and So Much MORE

I really respect the convictions of others...well, when they aren't based in legalism. I'm willing to let God's direction in someone's life be as valid as His move in mine...even if we don't agree. (Pretty much. I'm only a little strong-willed. Haha.) And, where possible, I want to do my best to not cause them to stumble.

One of the things God has been releasing me into more is my role in Christianity as a woman. An equal opportunity woman. ;) For the most part, my experience has been totally awesome!! Many of the men in my life aren't somehow more insecure because of how God has made women, and in fact, one of the ways they express their masculine strength is in paving the way for women to "become". I've had some seriously awesome investment!!!

Occasionally, though, I have the odd experience with a legalist. Usually I can just shake it off, but sometimes...it gets under my skin.

Enter...God. :)

I was driving out of my driveway the other day, heading to a "women in ministry" scenario. While I was headed to the end of my road, two little girls came running out and placed some items in the road where my car would go. They then ran back to the side of the road and waited with excitement. I slowed down a ways back and asked if they wanted me to run over something for them. Well...apparently, yes...because they began squealing and jumping up and down. So, there I was, crushing their little sticks and whatever else they put there. I drove off watching them come out to see the delighted damage.

As I pulled up to the stop sign, I heard the Holy Spirit say, "See? THIS is what we are doing! Crushing what's ahead of them so they can be more released some day!"

Yep...I was blessed and totally speechless. :)

So, now? You know it! I'm stepping more fully into whatever adventure He puts before me. Less hesitation. More courage! Living out loud, baby! For God, for me and for them!!! It's what He has for us all! Awesome!

My First Wedding!!

Yep! It's true! I officiated my first wedding. It was a great experience for this girl! At first I was hesitant because I'm not a pastor and...well, I'm a girl. But, man, was it a great challenge for me to explore! God really used it in my life to broaden my vision and fall more in love with His heart!! AND...The couple was amazing!!! Their love is so special.

If I could roll my eyes more...

Oh my word! I deal with teenagers all day long, so I'm familiar with immaturity, over-reactions, and all of the other "fun" stuff associated with their kind. I actually have a measure of patience for it because I know they are growing. It's adults that can put me over the edge!!!!! Seriously! What's with adults who have the coping skills of a hormonal teen? What's with the grand tantrums and over-reactions to life's challenges? What's with the constant DRAMA???

...Ya, I'll deal with it for a time, but then...NOPE! Time to put on the big girl panties and grow up!!!

Sigh. Venting done. ;)

The Croods...and the church

I saw this movie with my nieces the other day. So cute. As we were enjoying it, I kept having this odd feeling that the story was symbolic of...the church!!!! Hahaha! Yep, it reminds me of the struggle of some to do more than "survive"...but to grow and expand into more of His heart for kingdom living. I might just be Epe. ;) Check it out...you might be surprised. :)

Brave

Single and In The Church

Ok...I have to post this. A friend sent it to me and felt she could really relate. I'm not necessarily agreeing with everything in the article, but the notion that the church is a bit family/marriage biased...well, I really see it. Unintentionally exclusive...so sad.

Single And In The Church

The Story

So wonderful. His story...our story.

 

Paying the Price

We live in a family in which we pay the price for someone else to get breakthrough. - Bill Johnson

I know this is meant in reference to ministry, but it's actually true for so many things. The breakthroughs in the lives of others...while it can be tough...are worth the price paid.

Idol of Certainty

Here's what my weekend looks like! So excited! Challenges to think about things are like pure gold for this girl. Yay!

Idol of Certainty Conference

Farewell, Sweet Lady!

Something both happy and quite sad. My very special grandma, Lorraine, passed on this weekend. Such a full and beautiful life...such a gift and example to all who knew her.

She finally gets to be with Grandpa in heaven. What a lovely pair they were. :)

I was realizing what a gift it is...tears of a certain sort...ones that come because of loving and being loved by someone so amazing. Not tears of regret, not tears of pain...tears of relationship and investment.

Yep...that's the grief I have.

And I'm so excited to see her again some day. :)

She's Back!!

Wow...it's been a while since my last post!!! Life's been just insane but with very cool opportunities and challenges. So...while absent, it's still been quite productive! The theme of this year has been the "Year of Opportunity" after all. :)

So...here's to women's events, soaking prayer events, excellent professional starts and opportunities, growth and maturity personally and within community...it goes on and on and on.