Election on the Horizon

It's almost here!!! Tuesday is Election Day! I haven't done as much as others, but it's definitely been a busy season. Folding letters, knocking on doors, stuffing boxes, making calls, manning booths...I'm tired! Many of the candidates really have a good shot this year...so I'm really hopeful. We'll see! And then I'll nap. ;)

CRAZY!

oh man...no specifics here. sorry. i am almost at my wit's end regarding an invisibility issue. i...hate...when...i...feel...that...way.

Where the Life Goes

Well...our community just got some terrible news. The fall of a leader. Certainly, it is assumed "innocent until proven guilty", but it sure seems like things are leaning in a sad direction.

It reminds me of something though...

We need to pay attention to the direction of life in our lives. Are we life-BRINGERS or life-TAKERS? I think God's ideal for the wonderful human spirit is to receive life from him...living from a full heart...and bring that life to all of our roles, responsibilities and relationships. A cup that runneth over. Living less than human, of course, means that in the absence of being filled with life to the full, we literally suck the life out of those previously mentioned areas. Feeding rather than sharing. Doing so???...well, it really limits our effectiveness and "shine"...but it also sets us up for terrible falls. Hurting the very ones we could have helped...

Titanic Thoughts

Alright...I must admit that I saw this movie SEVEN times in the theater when it first came out. It was soooo moving for me. I literally cried OUT LOUD the first time I saw it. Interesting question though, isn't it?...a choice between the one that represents control and/or appearances (a.k.a. the safe life) and the one that speaks to her heart. Wow!

Also...the song by Celine Dion??...the way she sings the end...the soft cry...so captures the sound of deep heart-grief for me. You know...past the loud pain to the moan of deep sorrow. She's right on! If you can't hear it in this clip, search out another. It's amazing!

Jack was such a "Jesus" for me by the way...and someday hopefully my Mr. Right. ;)

Heaven Thoughts

I've decided that God should let me be one of all of three things when I get to heaven...HAHA!...a drummer, a dancer, or a Glee-style group singer. Ya...that is all. ;)

Dreamed a Dream

Man, I think I'm in a Les Mis mode!!! I must be needing to see it so very soon! Here's a Glee-version of a great song from the play. *sigh*

Being a Nice Girl

Why does being nice to some people have to be so hard? I mean "hard" for the one you are trying to show some kindness to... In a strange way it makes the one who's just trying to be nice actually feel guilty or embarassed for causing angst. It's hard for me to understand.

BUT...I guess I'd rather be the weirdie who tries to help...although I wouldn't mind not feeling so awkward. Guess it's a choice of mine to feel that way about it or not. :)

Quotes

Anais Nin had fantastic quotes! How funny that her profession was an erotic literature writer in the 50's!

Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.


I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman.
 
We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are.
 
And, of course, my favorite...
 
There came a time when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.

Laminin

Ya...I'm such a science nerd. What can I say though...it literally brought me back to my faith in God after a little journey away. :)

BUDs

Another event on the horizon! I get to spend an evening with the little ladies at First Baptist Church for their Christmas Tea in December. These gals are a total blast! All ranging in age from 5 to 11. So sweet!...and So spicey!!

Best Scene!

Gladiator

What can I say?...I was missing a little of the Gladiator.

Can't help it...

...but I really want to be pursued. I want to be wanted and known for who I am in the deepest sense. I don't aspire to be anything less. And...I intend to be/do the same for the him. What can I say?...I'm a quirky, mysterious and fabulous gal. ;)

Beauty and the Beast

By far...one of my favorite movies ever.

The Parent Wrapped Around the Pinkie

Ohhhhhh man! One of the worst kinds of situations that I have to deal with in school is the parent who is snuggly wrapped around the finger of a manipulative child. Drives me INSANE! You know why???...the kid's cards are never called and so much growth is delayed. Truthfully, it signs the child up for the School of Hard Knocks. VERY frustrating! What to do??...wait for the moment when the manipulation is so abundantly clear that the parent has to dislodge from the finger. Unfortunately, that type of situation is generally pretty serious. Otherwise, the unwrapping would happen a ton sooner.

Grrr!

Me.

The Challenge

HAHA! Well...how to put this...I Lived!! Those who know me well know how much of a challenge it is for me to be "me". What I mean by that is that it has been very difficult for me to just be myself. Who I am today is far less the "wallflower" than I used to be, but I still wrestle with the challenge to not hide myself.

A great desire and struggle for me is the fact that I enjoy speaking. Women's ministry, kid's ministry, sermons, school presentations...I love it. I love any opportunity to learn more...to grow...in that area. I gravitate towards anything that has a spiritual or character orientation. I also love anything pro-life (as you can tell from my profile). The struggle??...I've occasionally experienced judgment for it...especially from men. Not all men, that's for sure. Some of my biggest supporters and mentors are men...and I so value that. Others though?...I don't know if it's a competitive thing or a pride thing, but I've had some hurts in that department. Speaking has actually become a realm of great joy and great risk for this girl.

Well, I had a surprise yesterday related to that. I don't know what the impression was yet, but at least I didn't pass out or hide "me" too terribly. Great challenge! Nice surprise!

Tomorrow's Sermon Song

Dynamite

Sometimes you just have to let go and dance around. That's my plan. :)

I'm here

I'm feeling a bit invisible. Some situations provoke that in me. It's puzzling, isn't it?...the times we don't give a rat's arse...and the times our boats get so rocked we have no clue where "up" is... Yep, interesting. I guess I'm just not sure what to do with a case where I'm clearly the "second class citizen". The thing is, I'm not a wallflower...and in fact, I'm worth the dance. So...I'm just trying to decide what's up and what to do next.

Chip Cravaack

Voting in 17A

The Invisible Person

I have found it so entertaining lately to watch white people who really don't spend too much time in the presence of people of color. (I've actually experienced the reverse too!) When there is such a person around, some of those "whitie's" act so WEIRD!! And, I don't even mean people who are racist at all...just people who unknowlingly (or knowingly) feel there is a difference and have no clue how to act. Sadly, the other usually becomes an invisible person...not by their choice or doing, but by their treatment. It's like it's easier to just pretend they aren't there than actually step into the "unknown".

I don't have that particular reaction because I've been blessed with a host of family and friends that color up my life. So wonderful! BUT, before I can get too proud of myself, I realize that I too have a particular people-type that makes me get all flustered and uncomfortable.

So, I'm wondering...who are the invisible people in our lives? People of all shapes, colors, and sizes who somehow make us feel "different". And...what will it take to step into the "differences" and actually get to know people?

Hmm...

Memoirs of a Bullied Kid

A friend posted this today on Facebook. It's a powerful story.

Single Dad Laughing: Bullying

Interesting Prof Quote

Greg Boyd was a fantastically controversial professor at Bethel when I attended. I enjoyed how he challenged our "thinkings" on so many topics related to faith. While we aren't in total agreement on all things...where'd be the fun in that!...his honesty really helped me to own my faith (and be open to my relationship with God driving my life rather than popular and/or acceptable dogmatic thought)!!

He just twittered this...food for thought...

"I find it perfectly absurd to suppose that nature alone evolved creatures like us who yearn for things nature itself can never provide."

Blow Off

Grrr...I don't like it when that happens. Are some just not good with valuing others? Maybe they just don't get it or understand what that feels like or are just afraid of something...? Hmm. It's not like I'm a mean person...or a crazy person (most of the time). ;) I guess it's just hard to know that I'm probably being judged based on who knows what info, and there's nothing I can do about it. All the trying in the world can't change it, so it's a little sad. BUT...I guess I just keep on moving.

I'll Be

Breath of God

Rebecca DeZurik came to school the other day to sing and talk to the kiddos. She sang this song, and it really blessed me. I totally needed it that day!

Resident Evil: Afterlife

Yaaaa...I hate to admit it, but I'm an "Alice" fan. I don't know why I love seeing zombies get what they have coming to them...I just do.

Why She Says I'm a Gypsy...

Well...I finally found out what this whole "gypsy" business is about (see previous for background). :) I was so confused by my niece's thought that I'm a "real-live" gypsy. I had an encounter with a gypsy in Spain a few years ago when a friend was being pick-pocketed by one. Haha! Yes, I know that the stealing was by 1 gypsy...and that all gypsies are not like this. Even still, I was confused because I'm about as Swedish as they come here. I talked to the teacher this morning, and she said that she actually just showed them two clips of Esmerelda from the Disney movie "Hunchback of Notre Dame". In one, the gypsy woman is singing and dancing, and in the other she sings about her heart for outcasts. Below is the song she sang. So "C" came in after school and I had the clip playing. She said, "Yep, that's you, Auntie". Apparently, I sing with a tambourine and love the outcasts. ;)

The Gypsy

Well, here's the strangest thing. My 6-yr-old niece came to my office after school today to tell me about what she learned in class. She proceeded to tell me about gypsies and showed me an art project she made. She then said to me, "Auntie, when she was talking about gypsies, I kept saying to myself that Auntie Sarah is a real-live gypsy."

HAHA!...What???

Hmm...I absolutely must find out from the teacher what in the world they talked about. I'll report back later...

God, Give Me Strength!

AHHH! I seriously need a bit of patience right now...and probably less of a pride flare-up too! Hehe! I have a couple of people in my life who LOVE to be the "experts" on every freakin' thing...with very little life experience to go with it. It drives me bonkers. 

Storms..

Interesting...New Middle Road

I Try

Les Miserables

If you ever get the chance, you MUST see the musical "Les Miserables". It's actually pronounced "lay miserab" ('a' in father). Anyway, it's just the best broadway play that I've ever seen...a great contrast between grace and legalism...plus, all the kinds of love. :)

Upcoming Opportunities

Well...my plate is starting to fill up again. Some of the new things are actually going to be great challenges for me. I'm excited to see what God does. The first is a sermon/teaching about Jesus calming the storm. That's in a couple of weeks. The second is a women's retreat. I have to prepare a couple of teachings. Should be interesting!

My Students

Oh my gosh...seriously! I love my kids this year! Ya, I know they have their struggles, but they are so much more real and accessible. Makes my job a lot more fun and rewarding...also lets us all (them included) see a ton of progress in whatever area it's needed. I have so many kiddos that are invested learners...woo-hoo! Makes teaching a blast.

Ask the Right Questions...

I think it's wise...when considering solutions...to make sure I am asking the right question. Seems like a no brainer, I guess. However, so many of our answers to the world's problems seem less an actual answer and more a way to avoid really dealing with people (but making ourselves feel like we've done something).

Not good enough.

Shaking head...

oh man...sometimes. maybe it's that i'm not afraid of jumping in some teen's trench and addressing an issue... i get so frustrated by adults that tiptoe around some teens...i.e. being manipulated...and not just addressing the issues! if you aren't a shamer, jump the freak in!!! they NEED it! they DESERVE it! they are WORTH it! skirting around issues might make them "feel" all fuzzy, but in the long-run it's a HUGE disservice. making more rules so you don't have to address the heart behind a challenge???...STUPID! deal with the kid...they are real and valuable people after all.

man, i love blog-venting. ;)

HAHAHAHAHA!

"What is it that creates a rainbow effect in a sprinkler...this cannot be natural..." HAHAHAHAHA! I think I might hyperventilate from laughter!!!

Step into the Unknown

I've been running into an interesting conundrum lately. The Christian who is absolutely dependent on relating to God ONLY through an instructional "how to" book. They don't like to read the Bible without a study guide. They don't like to spend time with God without a scripted prayer. The notion of anything other than "structure" and "formulas" to create a sense of divine intimacy is insane!!

Insane..but oh so short of what it all could be.

Getting people to step into the unknown mess of an actual relationship with God...two-way intimacy...man, that's tough.

A good challenge though. ;)

Sermon Topic

Hmm...I have a teaching to do in a couple of weeks. Jesus vs. the Storm. Considering the fact that my life has been one lately...this should be...umm, interesting. Haha! :)

Depressing!!

man, but strangely i'm a lover of songs like this.

Closer to Love

Career Thoughts 3

Another aspect of my job that I love...helping kids that are struggling. For some reason, Friday was "purge the soul" day with some of my high school students. They walked into my office and told me things they are struggling with but want to work on or walk out of. Wow!! Gutsy kiddos!! I admire it because it involves a huge risk...what if I reject them?, what if I discipline them?, what if there's no hope of progress?... But they are so desperate to "get real" that they'll take the leap! I get to be someone who tells them there's hope. I also get to help them (sometimes with parents too...depending on the issue) choose discipline/accountability, find counsellors if necessary and begin the tough road home. All the while??...huge amounts of honor and value and love. I, of course, always pray that they choose this direction as opposed to me having to "catch" them and make their lives miserable until they choose to love themselves enough to make a change. Hehe!

Summing it up?...coming alongside someone who wants restoration and peace in their life.

Career Thoughts 2

So...in my thoughts about "next" in my career journey, I've decided to look at the parts of my job that I enjoy. First?...teaching. When I get to pass along 'wonder' and find ways to translate the tough stuff in a way that is ultimatley understood, I experience great satisfaction. I love to continue to learn so I feel like I'll always have something to share. Honestly, I also enjoy taking on things that I know absolutely nothing about. I get to learn it, find the "amazing", and pass it on. Love it!