Sunday, August 31, 2008

Questioning "Who" To Be

do you ever have situations where you actually wonder...and sometimes worry...about how much of yourself you can be? i guess i'm having one of those.

because of some old wounds and past boundary issues (to be honest)...i have some real reticence about being able to be myself in some situations. not all for sure...just a couple. it's a trust thing in a few of them...and if i feel that, i feel more comfortable just being myself. all of weird, little old me.

but i'm in a quandary right now.

what if you ran into an old friend...a friend that you were really good friends with at one time...but there was some stuff that happened...some good, some not so good...and it kinda shook you up. how would you be friends with that old friend?

could you be free to just be you despite what's happened? is that even possible?

and what if you aren't the same "you" that you used to be? is it even possible to break out of the definitions that may be in place from the past? is it even worth it to try?

but even more than that...what in the heck is appropriate? do you not talk that through and just let a dead horse lie? do you ask and look like a freak?

is it bad to take care of "me"? is it better to just be the friend...give no matter what you get?

see how complicated life is? AHHHHH!

No comments: