Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Lessons from a Funeral: #2

Mysteries are not absent a good Father.

We have put so much effort into answering all of the questions that life throws our way. There is a "safety" in knowing...though more a facade than a reality, I believe. Unfortunately, all of our "definitives" make us ill-equipped to wade into the mysteries (if it is possible to prepare for such things). Facts bring no comfort there.

Walking into mystery as a child of a good Father is a matter entirely different. A soulful "knowing"...the kind that is less necessarily factual and more relational...allows "deep to call unto deep". While painful, there is known presence...His presence.

In death I have often found myself incapable of worship. The lack of heart-satisfying answers prompted such bitterness towards God that the notion of praise became unbearable. I suppose some of that was due to the anger that comes with grief. Much, though, came from the notion that God should have some good reason for the tragedy...and in the lack of such evidence I have judged Him wicked.

Last night was different.

While intensely painful...seeing a mother kiss her baby before closing the casket, feeling their pain...the relationship into which I've been ushered with the good Father gave me more a sense of His presence than a need for answers. In the mystery of this death I experienced that we were not alone. He was thickly with us. I wanted not to hide but to be fully present too.

Life has its mysteries...some of which are tragic. Those places, while lacking reason and answer sometimes, are not an abyss for the heart. There is a good Father there whose heart weeps as our hearts weep, showing us that alongside pain, there can be peace.

1 comment:

Ethio said...

Little Miss middle kibble said after the funeral, "I want to go to that church from now on. That pastor has NO ANSWERS!" Well put.