The Relator

One of the other aspects that I enjoy about the Strengthsfinders Assessment is the appreciation it encourages for strengths other than your own. Thankfully, God designed us to function as a "body"...a community...so no one person has the strengths necessary to run the whole show. Basically, we need each other...and need to understand the giftings in others.

What it also helps me to do is realize that all strengths have their "down-sides" depending on use. First, we don't always understand that the behavior of a person could actually be the expression of a strength. It's a good reminder to step back before judging. Second, people sometimes misuse their strengths in places where others could administer more effectively and/or they over-exert a strength in a time of desperation (making it need-driven rather than naturally expressed). And third, it also helps me understand myself and that some of my "norms" aren't always understood by those around me.

Here's one that tends to get me in "misunderstood" trouble! Surfacy-talk is actually not a favorite of mine. I quickly run out of things to talk about, and I think it makes people think I'm not interested in them. The truth is that I'm actually a Relator, and I'm usually VERY interested in the people in my life. It's just that I tend to be interested in...this...

"Relator describes your attitude toward your relationships. In simple terms, the Relator theme pulls you toward people you already know. You do not necessarily shy away from meeting new people−in fact, you may have other themes that cause you to enjoy the thrill of turning strangers into friends−but you do derive a great deal of pleasure and strength from being around your close friends. You are comfortable with intimacy. Once the initial connection has been made, you deliberately encourage a deepening of the relationship. You want to understand their feelings, their goals, their fears, and their dreams; and you want them to understand yours. You know that this kind of closeness implies a certain amount of risk−you might be taken advantage of−but you are willing to accept that risk. For you a relationship has value only if it is genuine. And the only way to know that is to entrust yourself to the other person. The more you share with each other, the more you risk together. The more you risk together, the more each of you proves your caring is genuine. These are your steps toward real friendship, and you take them willingly."

Ya, it can get a little tricky sometimes because others aren't always interested in that. Ha! Life is so complicated!! ;)